It was cathartic, really, because I just needed to get it all off my chest. As much as I love my daughter, I don't enjoy being a mom. I was a little scared people would come at me in the comments and say was I monster, but I was actually met with overwhelming support. Turns out, a lot of moms and dads!
That doesn't make them awful parents or bad people—it just means they're honest. It's been so encouraging to hear other parents talking about their doubts and frustrations, too. And after hearing from other moms who struggled with the newborn stage, I really do think now I'll start enjoying motherhood more once my daughter is a little older and her personality starts to shine through.
In the meantime, my daughter is loved and well taken care of. Many people asked if I was suffering from postpartum depression , but after talking to several moms who've had it, I don't think I am. That said, I do feel empowered now to speak up to my doctor about what I'm experiencing.
There's no shame in having moments of wondering whether I'm just not cut out for motherhood. It does sadden me that while I got such support from other parents online, this is still somewhat of a taboo topic in real life. So many of us are struggling with similar feelings about motherhood, but we don't feel like it's something we can talk about.
If we did, I think a lot of other new mothers could avoid feeling alone. I hope I can be a small part of starting the conversation. Save Pin FB More. Let the house be a little messier than you might normally accept.
Allow your kids to watch an extra show, so you can drink your coffee in peace if this will make you feel more capable of being a mom overall. Let go of the guilt you feel when you cannot be a perfect mom. Communicate your needs clearly. Your partner is not a mind-reader.
Be specific about what you need from them. Do you think you could cook dinner every Thursday to help me? Coping with the ups and downs of being a mom can be easier with expert guidance from BetterHelp online counselors. They know being a mom is a stressful job and want to help you gain useful tools and resources to make things better. These counselors understand that moms need an outlet to express their emotions and sort out their feelings, so they can focus on providing for their families.
Sharing your feelings with an expert is a productive way of dealing with them. With BetterHelp, you can discuss your situation in confidence when it is convenient for you. Learn how others have benefited from working with an online counselor by reading the following reviews, from people experiencing similar issues. While meeting the needs of your children is a priority, taking care of your personal needs and getting adequate emotional support is also a priority.
Strengthen your parenting abilities by applying these valuable tools and resources, so you can fully enjoy your role as a mom. Take the first step today. However, there are other moms that struggle with feeling the same way that you do. It may have started during pregnancy. This can make it difficult to be excited about giving birth, picking out baby names, baby food, and everything else that comes with being a mom.
You may struggle with being a mom because of the intense pressure that it adds to your life. Social media like Pinterest has created a new pressure on moms to feel that they have to create the perfect lives to be social media worthy. Baby names have to be purposeful, meaningful, and newsworthy. Security of a healthy baby and family seems to fall in comparison to making sure that everything looks just right for the judging eyes of others.
It may mean that you would benefit from meeting with a mental health professional like a licensed therapist. Some women cannot wait to be a mom. They enjoy the benefits of being a mom so much that it makes things like learning how to sleep train, using breast pumps, potty training, symptoms from pregnancy, baby food stains and sleepless nights worth it.
Just days after, a family conflict between my partner and his sister was brought into our family, and it all became too much. My ex-partner was called out of the house to smooth things over. We just had a brand new baby, and I felt he should have focused on us learning to be a family of four together. I remember hating every minute, not being able to open my eyes without crying. I had let everything wear me down so damn much that I had lost my strength and power.
I had let these things affect me so much that there was a time where I regretted being a mom. I still have moments where I feel like it is all too much and I think I am an inch away from crossing the line from sanity to insanity. Most of you moms that hate the title still love your kids.
They may even hate the process of doing so. You always have to ask your kids to brush their teeth, comb their hair, and go to bed. You are up to your elbows in diapers and wipes. Even when they are asleep and resting, it can seem unenjoyable.
It may be that you feel like your life has been in ruins or like you are missing out. Maybe you had to give up your career, your travel plans or your time out with friends. Perhaps you have prior-parenting life envy. You might say or do things that you wish you could control.
Whatever the reason is and we are going to discuss some of them here , there are things that you CAN do to make it more enjoyable, or at the very least… easier. There are a lot of reasonings that can lead to regretting being a mom. Some seriously feel like they are out of your control. Postpartum or postnatal depression is the case of a mother experiencing depression following childbirth.
As a new mom or a mom that has had children for years, there are a lot of challenges that you face. You are also probably dealing with lack of sleep, life stressors, changes to your roles and responsibilities and changes within your relationships and career.
You might feel sad, overly tired, helpless, stressed, lost or isolated. You may wonder what is wrong with you. I loved both of my babies but really struggled to bond with them. The sound of them crying sent me stupid all the time. I was desperately unhappy. Postpartum Depression is not something to be embarrassed about or overlooked. There is professional support for you, and we will discuss this in the second part of this article. Exercise, self-care, relaxation and surrounding yourself with great people can also help if you have Postpartum Depression.
That crushing feeling that you get when you see the freedom that your childless friends have. It is so easy for them to say yes to everything.
They can make decisions that only require considering them. I am sure many of our friends without children think that we enjoy spending our days scrolling through Instagram and planning hours of fun, engaging and educational activities for our kids from the myriad of bright ideas that we can find.
This stuff can be great, but;. Sometimes we want to have a wine and be able to leave the house then and there without having to bring our kids or find a babysitter. Kids can be hard work and being a mom can be tiring. We all know this. But for some moms, the tiring moments happen every day. And sometimes this adds up to the point where we become exhausted. I used to imagine my mind as a little avatar character on a treadmill 24 hours a day. Running, running and running and never stopping.
For moms, it is a battle to leave the fricken front door of the house on most occasions. We are masters of logistics, chaos, problem-solving and negotiation to bloody step outside. If you want to laugh your arse off at a reenactment of this moment, make sure you take a few minutes out of your day to watch this.
Now, I live in Bali with my kids, which means we travel everywhere on a scooter. Yes, all four of us can fit on it. Myself at the back, then my four-year-old, my partner drives and my two-year-old sits in a baby holder on the front.
The nappy bag goes inside the seat, and off we go to get from door to bike about 21 feet away. It would take two adults three seconds to get there.
For us, it would be about 33 minutes on a good day. And that is once we are ready to go after all the planning and packing. Before mum life, this would have been easy. I would have thrown half a carton of vodkas in my scooter, and off I would go with no one to worry about but me. We work with them, and they work against us every day. Seriously, motherhood is hard.
Little people take up so much of our time and our physical and emotional energy. We are making decisions for the wellbeing of other human beings. They are also fulfilling the roles of work, being a friend, a partner, a committee member — extra-curricular mom duties. Hectic to say the very least. I have had moments when I have felt like I have so much going on that my body has wanted to shut down.
Get kids ready, go to work, work, pick up kids, be present, play, cook, mealtime, bath, bottle, book, bed, struggle, bed, out of bed, nighttime feed, repeat. I get it, mom; I get it. How many of you experienced a feeling of loss, like you are missing out on something.
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